I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
