i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
