also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
