We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
