Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
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