I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
