Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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