It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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