I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Randomize
