Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
this just has baby written all over it
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
