It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
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