hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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