i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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