Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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