I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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