dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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