her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Randomize
