I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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