i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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