OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
