got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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