I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
