How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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