Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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