so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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