Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
