My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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