You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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