My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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