I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
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