It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
