so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
