At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
she smelled like a LAN party
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize