Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
