Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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