He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
