There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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