There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
