At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
