How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
