Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
