WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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