i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
