you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Im part way to drunk.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
