i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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