Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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