is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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