question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
