No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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