apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize