Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
