I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
